


we'll be just fine

by howyoubrewing



Series: skyguy and snips [6]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Ahsoka Tano Needs a Hug, Ahsoka Tano-centric, Anakin Skywalker Doesn't Turn to the Dark Side, Canon Divergence - Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, Family, Fix-It, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Master & Padawan Relationship(s), The Force, no order 66
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:14:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25039084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/howyoubrewing/pseuds/howyoubrewing
Summary: The Force begins to scream in pain, and Ahsoka wonders if she is dying. Far from Mandalore, Anakin Skywalker makes a different decision.or: if Anakin never turned and Ahsoka came back to the Order after the war.
Series: skyguy and snips [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1932007
Comments: 23
Kudos: 190





	1. Chapter 1

Mandalore is on fire.

Ahsoka Tano balances precariously on the metal strung high above the city, observing the chaos that has been slowly subsiding ever since they took Maul away in the transport ships. She hardly remembers it, honestly, was scarcely able to nod when Rex told her they would go get him locked up and then meet her at the surface. It feels like a bizarre blur. Did she really capture Maul? How long ago was that?

The second she stepped foot onto that Jedi cruiser, time had ceased to be reality and she had been unable to fully process the fact that she was back with the 501st, with Anakin and Master Obi-Wan (annoying as he had been in their discussions about the Chancellor) and Rex. It was the last thing she ever expected, not after months and months of essentially hiding from the Jedi and living in the underbelly of Coruscant. She’d resigned herself from ever seeing them again, as much as the thought hurt her deeply. It just wasn’t something she expected.

And then Bo-Katan had tracked her down, and the war on Mandalore drew her back to the Jedi…

She’s still upset that Anakin hadn’t come with her. It feels childish, but she’s bitter, honestly, that he isn’t here right now, helping her take down Maul, reliving their glory days together with the Republic. She knows those times are past, that they were history as soon as she chose to leave the Order, but some tiny part of her hoped he would come.

It’s not the first time she’s cursed the Chancellor. She doesn’t trust the man.

She does, however, remember the words spilling from her mouth as Anakin turned to leave—as she grabbed his arm, pulling him into a hug after initially being so cold and distanced.

_I think I might be ready to come back to the Order after this, Master._

She’d meant it, too, even though she didn’t realize how badly she wanted it until she was reunited with the men and the Jedi. If the Jedi could make changes, improvements…she could return. She had done her months of contemplating and healing and forgiving those who wronged her—she wanted a home again, and that was with Anakin and her men.

A smile tugs at the corners of her mouth remembering the look of pure _happiness_ on Anakin’s face. It made it all worth it. And she’ll see him soon, when they arrived on Coruscant, and they could finalize her decision…

Ahsoka thinks about this as the Republic ships soar around the city and the skyline burns. Maul’s insurgents have been overtaken, she knows, and are surrendering. Bo Katan will handle them, and she’s grateful she doesn’t have to stay for that painstaking process of reorganizing a planet after a war when she’s dying to get back to Coruscant. Her body aches, the intensity of fighting Maul catching up with her, and she fights off a wave of dizziness. She had just… _defeated_ a kriffing _Sith Lord._ One that had bested Master Kenobi and killed several Jedi, including Obi-Wan’s master all those years ago. How had she managed that? She wasn’t even a real Jedi anymore.

Still, it took nearly everything out of her. She should probably get down from being up so high.

She vaults back down through the broken window in the palace, where her battle with Maul had begun, and makes her way to the street, attempting to remain steady on her feet. Kix would be fussing over her if she showed even the slightest sign of fatigue or injury, and she wants to avoid that. Nothing to sidetrack her from getting back to Anakin and continuing their conversation. Surely rescuing the Chancellor would be relatively straightforward, and he would be ready to see her by the time they returned?

Another surge of vertigo almost overtakes her as she nears the doors, spotting Rex across the street, and she staggers. It’s not just the exhaustion, now, it’s…something else. Something happening in…the Force? She is confused.

Then it happens, slowly yet all at once, and she’s lost in the sudden darkness and horrendous pain vibrating through the Force and straight into her bones.

Her vision goes black, all of her senses succumbing to the agony in her mind. Her montrals and brain are filled with a horrible, inhuman shrieking that she can’t identify, as if the Force itself is crying out. Her body feels like it’s about to explode, every cell writhing as the screaming grows louder. She does not know if she, too, is screaming.

She sees images from her past, suddenly, swimming in and out of memory. The older version of herself on Mortis, warning that she would die if she remained Anakin’s student. Palpatine revealing himself as the Sith Lord, which is _not_ a memory so how can that be? The Father saying that Anakin was the Chosen One. _Everyone_ saying that he was the Chosen One, that he would bring balance to the Force.

_Is that what is happening now?_

Her throat is tight, her chest like a weight is crushing it. She can’t seem to escape this darkness, this oblivion that is trying to swallow her while the Force splinters and suffers like nothing she’s ever imagined was possible. She could be lost forever in the void and no one would know where she went.

 _Please, stop_ , she begs it, though she does not know if anyone is listening.

 _Anakin!_ She screams, not knowing if it is out loud or in her mind through their bond. _Please, you have to stop this, you have to kill him!_

 _Snips?_ The voice makes her gasp, jarred back almost to reality, the pain ebbing just a bit. Enough for her to finally realize that much of the pain is coming from _him._

 _Please,_ she begs, and she doesn’t know who she’s talking to any more.

“Commander!” A sharp, worried voice cuts through her thoughts and she finds herself on the ground, shaking, looking up at Rex. He’s crouched beside her, a gentle hand on her face, another on her shoulder to steady her. She realizes she’s shuddering and can’t stop, feeling freezing cold and feverish at the same time, sweat beading her brow, shoulders heaving.

“Rex—” her throat is constricted, the words barely coming out of her mouth. Even saying just his name is almost too much effort, and her vision blurs again.

“Come on, Ahsoka, stay with me. Tell me what happened,” he tries again, and she feels his gloved hand cupping her face to keep her head from dropping back to the concrete.

“Something’s wrong,” she chokes, trying desperately to convey the darkness and agony she feels in the Force, which he cannot fathom. “Anakin. The Force. Something’s happening.”

He understands enough—her current ill condition helps convey the gravity of the situation. She’s fairly sure he’s more worried about her than the Force, but he nods anyways.

“Maul’s all loaded up, let’s get you back to the ship for Kix to look at you, and we’ll head straight for Coruscant, okay kid?”

Ahsoka tries to get up but her limbs won’t cooperate; they feel as if they weigh thousands of tons. Rex lifts her into his arms without hesitating, and she’s too limp to be stubborn and argue that she can stand herself. “Easy. I got you, Commander.”

She can’t stop shivering even as they arrive at the dropship and he wraps a blanket around her as it takes off, soaring towards the star destroyer. The Force is no longer howling through her brain, but it still feels raw and shattered. Her mind feels shot and fried, like a circuit board submerged in the ocean. Her bond with Anakin seems millions of miles away, inaccessible right now, and thinking hurts.

“Where’s Anakin?” She whispers to Rex. She can’t recall.

He frowns, his hold on her tightening. “He’s with the Chancellor, kid, remember?”

Ahsoka opens her mouth to protest that no, she doesn’t, that’s why she _asked_ him, when suddenly the sharp, staggering pain in her mind returns with a vengeance. This time she hears herself scream, loud and piercing, and her body is convulsing, and Rex is yelling for a medic as he runs onboard the main ship—

When she thinks she can’t possibly take the agony anymore, the Force has some sort of pity on her—a different darkness overcomes her sight, and she fades into unconsciousness.


	2. Chapter 2

Ahsoka wakes slowly, wincing at the bright lights and the too-white walls. One of her wrists is bandaged and she’s still streaked with dirt and dried blood. An IV is stuck into her forearm, and her eyes follow the line to the bag of fluids hanging by the bed as she tries to put the pieces together. Why is she here? _Where_ is she? Where is Anakin—

She gasps as she remembers, as it hits her like a punch in the gut. The pain in the Force, Rex carrying her to the ship…

_Where is Anakin? Is he okay?_

Time is running out, she thinks, and she tears the IV out of her arm and throws the bedsheets to the side, stumbling out of bed. The blood rushes to her head and she about passes out again, but she fights it and makes a run for the door.

She smacks right into Kix as she clears the door, nearly knocking her over. His mouth drops open in surprise before he processes the scene before him.

“Commander! Get _back_ in bed!”

“Where’s General Skywalker?” She accuses, gripping the doorframe for stability. She’s just now realizing how weak her body still is. “Where the hell am I, Kix?”

For a horrible moment she’s sure that it’s too late—Anakin is hurt, or dead, or something _worse—_

“He’s on his way, Ahsoka,” Kix steadies her, grabbing her shoulders and attempting to steer her back into bed. “We just landed on Coruscant. There was a situation there they had to deal with, some fight at the Senate building, I don’t really know what. But we commed him as we approached our landing, and he’s coming, okay?”

“The Force…it felt wrong. Bad. I was worried he…” she trails off, the memories swimming in her mind. It’s hard for her to articulate what exactly she felt in the Force, and she sounds like a child describing a bad dream after she woke.

She shivers. Never again does she want to feel that.

“I know,” Kix nods sympathetically. “You were in pretty bad condition when Rex got you onboard. I thought it was a seizure or a sort of toxin in your body, but when the captain told me what you were muttering on about I figured it was different. Some Jedi thing. Anyways, we stabilized you and you seem to be recovering; whatever in the Force that made that happen to you seems to have calmed down.”

“It was horrible, Kix,” she whispers.

“I’m sure it was, sir. It was scary to see you like that. Really shook Rex up, too. But you need to _rest_ before the General gets here,” he implores again.

Ahsoka is about to comply, rolling her eyes at her overly-anxious medic and friend, when her bond with Anakin lights up and she senses him, close by. _He’s on the ship. He’s here!_

“He’s here, Kix, I sense him,” she cuts him off as he tries again in vain to get her back in bed. She leaves him there, muttering about how irresponsible Jedi are, and breaks into a run down the hallway, trying to keep her balance even though she’s still dizzy and drained. She just needs to _see_ him and everything will be fine—

Ahsoka bursts into the hangar of the ship and she finally spots him, speaking urgently with Rex (probably about her) and she wants to cry because he is _fine_ and everything’s going to be okay.

Anakin stops mid-sentence and turns around, a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth as he sees her. He looks so _tired,_ she realizes, his eyes so worn and weary, his shoulders slumped like the weight of the galaxy rests on them. It looks like some great battle has just been warred—but even though he looks like he could drop to the ground, there’s something in his smile that reassures her things are going to be okay.

They close the distance between them before she knows it, and she throws her arms around him without a second thought, tight, afraid to let go. Reveling in the fact that he is solid and here and breathing.

Anakin wraps her in an embrace and she buries her face in his robes, at last letting the tears flow freely that she has been fighting for so long. “Hey, Snips,” he whispers. “Good to see you.”

“I thought—I didn’t know what happened to you. It was awful, Master, the Force was screaming and it hurt so bad,” she cries into his chest. “It was like the Force was dying. It was the worst thing I’ve ever felt.”

“I know,” he comforts, pulling away and gently wiping her tears with his thumb. He can count on one hand the amount of times he’s seen Ahsoka cry, and it breaks his heart to see it. “I came right away when Rex called, you worried me sick. I didn’t realize how much it affected you.”

Ahsoka frowns at him. “What happened?”

He sighs. “I have a lot to tell you. But basically…the Chancellor is dead. I killed him.”

She gapes at him. “You _what?_ ”

“He was the Sith Lord. Right under our noses, the whole time,” he spits, looking ill at the thought. “He…tried to get me to join him. The Force screaming, it…it was because I was trying to balance it, to fight the Dark side in me. And the Dark hated it when I rejected it, and _then_ killed Palpatine. It reshaped the Force as we know it, because for most of the war it was clouded with the Chancellor’s manipulation.”

“He orchestrated the war,” she nods, understanding it all finally, remembering her vision, “and manipulated you the whole time.”

He flinches a little. She knows the guilt will eat at him for the rest of his life.

“Master,” she says softly, grabbing his arm, “I’m so proud of you.”

“I know I did the right thing, but I can’t believe I let him and the Dark side play me for so long,” he argues.

“It’s over now,” she assures him. “You balanced the Force, you don’t have to be the Chosen One anymore. You can just live a normal life, and we can improve the Jedi.”

“Are you really coming back?” He asks cautiously, as if he doesn’t want sound too hopeful. She was gone for nearly a year, after all, and it took him so long but he finally understood why she left.

She breaks into a smile, nodding. “I’m ready. Thanks for waiting for me, Skyguy.”

The look on his face is absolutely priceless, and she hasn’t seem him look so happy in ages. He squeezes her into another hug and she’s almost shouting with joy as she realizes, “Wait, Master…does this mean the war is over?”

He laughs. “I guess it does, Snips. We did it.”

Ahsoka stares at him, not wanting to get her hopes up. The war that she fought for years, the war that aged her and took away her childhood and so many of her brothers. The suffering. The nightmares and trauma that she knows won’t leave the shadows of her mind for the rest of her life. You can only fight in a war so long before you lose sight of the end, before you lose hope.

Anakin must sense her thoughts, and he lays a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Hey. I’m serious. We get to be normal Jedi for once.”

“The war’s _over_.” she grins, processing. “I never thought I’d live long enough to see this day.”

“You and me both, Snips,” he laughs, and the Force hums with joy and balance and she thinks, maybe, this is the happiest she’s been in years.

“You ready to get back to the Temple? I hear you have a promotion waiting for you.”


	3. Chapter 3

The ride back to the Temple is full of stories and laughter and teasing, catching up on all the time they’ve missed. The Coruscant traffic is worse than usual due to the, uh, _incident_ at the Senate and the slight chaos it triggered, but neither of them mind the extra time together.

Ahsoka tells him about defeating Maul (Anakin nearly has a kriffing heart attack during it) and after seeing his reaction, decides not to bring up her misadventures on Oba Diah for now (or the other unsavory places she’s been the last year). He’s easily slipped back into stressed-out-dad mode, and she hates to admit it but she _missed_ it, even though as a Padawan it drove her crazy.

The Force hums in satisfaction, their bond bright and whole and happy now that the two halves of it are finally back together. She feels his tension and anger slowly seeping away, as they reminisce on old times and he teases her like he used to.

Everything is perfect, in that moment.

And then the Temple appears in front of them and Ahsoka’s breath catches in her throat. She feels her vision tunnel, her chest tightening as the flashbacks swarm her.

_We see now that this was your great trial._

_You are hereby found guilty for treason against the Republic and expelled from the Jedi Order._

_I would never let anyone hurt you, Ahsoka, never!_

“Snips.” Anakin’s voice pulls her away from her dark memories. He puts a hand on her shoulder, his brow furrowed in concern. “Are you okay?”

She takes an unsteady breath and tries to stop her hands from shaking. She felt like she was ready, for a while, but now that the time is actually here she’s struggling to control the anxiety that’s turning her stomach to knots. She’d worked on forgiveness, and moving on, but the memories are suddenly so fresh and biting. “It’s just that the last time I was here…”

Anakin flinches—so microscopically that she might not have noticed if she didn’t know him well. The same image rings in both of their minds; Ahsoka, folding her Padawan beads back into his hand and walking down the Temple steps, away from him and the only life she’d ever known. It was one of the only times he’d ever seen her cry.

She’s never forgotten the look on his face as she said goodbye to him. In that moment, watching him struggle to prevent his tears from falling, she’d felt her heart crack in half along with his. It was something that kept her up at night—the amount of pure pain she’d inflicted on him by walking out of his life, after all he’d done for her and taught her. After all the times he almost died trying to protect her and keep her safe. The guilt threatened to eat her alive at times.

_How could you do that to someone who loved you so much?_

“Hey,” he says softly, as if he’s reading her thoughts. “It’s okay, Ahsoka.”

She bites her lip to keep from tearing up again—jeez, what is _with_ her today?—and just manages to choke out, “I’m so sorry.”

“Ahsoka, you’re here now. That’s all that matters,” he says, arm around her shoulders. “You know I don’t blame you for leaving, right? You had every reason to.”

“But I left _you,_ ” she tells him, her voice breaking. “That was the worst part. How much I hurt you.”

He shakes his head. “It wasn’t your fault.”

She leans her head on his shoulder, steadying herself. “If you say so.”

“I do. And trust me when I say, you coming back makes everything okay again. I promise. You’ll always be my family, Snips.”

She smiles, finally, her stomach settling as Rex pulls up to the hangar and lands and now she is _back,_ in the Temple, no longer an accused criminal or exile but a Jedi who has just defeated Maul and freed Mandalore, with the Chosen One now by her side. Ahsoka Tano knows who she is and what she is capable of, and she has no reason to be afraid to return home.

Anakin stays close to her side the entire time; as they walk through the hallways, the familiar soft, clean scent and elegant arches flooding her senses with memories of her time with Anakin and Obi-Wan, cracking inappropriate jokes with him behind Obi-Wan’s back. Her time as a youngling—remembering the feeling of trying so hard to be _good enough,_ consumed with the crippling fear that nobody would want to train her and she would be left alone forever.

Ahsoka was alone for too long this year. It’s time to come home, she thinks, and be with the family she loves.

The Council meeting is a strange and bizarrely smooth event, overall. Since Anakin has already sorted out the whole “I defeated the Chancellor/evil Sith Lord” thing with them, this is mostly just a meeting for _her,_ which is a new feeling. She is used to staying quietly at Anakin’s side, trying not to say anything too snarky or argue with the Council, and hoping none of them had any criticism to express towards her. But this is different, and she squirms a bit under the attention at first.

She sees Master Plo first and she just _knows_ he’s smiling at her, she’s always been able to tell even with the antiox mask. Obi-Wan is smiling warmly at her as well, and she feels a _little_ bad about being so rude to him before she left for Mandalore. She fixes Windu with a cold, stoic visage as he addresses the Council and begins the session. She can tell Anakin is trying his best not to strangle him.

 _Wait till he finds out Windu called me_ citizen. Ahsoka stifles a laugh at that one.

Truly, she wasn’t sure what to be expecting from the meeting—Obi-Wan speaks highly of her as he recounts her teaming up with Bo-Katan and contacting the Jedi for help, explaining how an ex-Jedi Padawan got involved in this whole mess, and then hands it off to Ahsoka to fill in the remainder of the story. By the time she is at the part where she and the 501st captured Maul (without her sabers, she mentions just to internally smirk at Windu’s expression) the entire Council looks astounded.

“Felt the balancing of the Force, did you, young Tano?” Yoda queries, and she grimaces slightly at the recollection of it.

“Yes, Master Yoda,” she responds. “My former Master and I still have quite a strong bond, and I felt the Force in pain. I was nearly overcome by it. My men were able to get me to medical.”

“Glad to hear that, we are. Grateful and in your debt are we for your help at the siege of Mandalore.” Yoda gives a knowing glance to Master Plo, who clears his throat.

“Dear Ahsoka, we know we have caused you a great deal of pain in your young life. We are deeply sorry, and we have been making some new decisions to change certain Jedi customs and codes to make them less…harsh. Particularly the amount of violence younglings and Padawans are exposed to, and…evaluating whether _all_ attachments should be forbidden.” His tone is fond and comforting, and she knows he speaks with honestly. 

Part of her is suspicious that this also has something to do with Anakin and the Senator being married. Maybe as some sort of reward for defeating the Sith Lord, the Council will allow him to. It’s really the least they can do.

The idea that attachments could be allowed? Hope swells in her chest—she can develop deeper relationships in her life without constantly feeling a sense of shame behind them. Maybe one day she can even find a person to spend her life with…who knew. But it opens up a well of possibilities in her heart and makes it feel so _light._

“Ahsoka,” says Obi-Wan, and he looks less _tired_ than usual, as if the galaxy’s weight has been lifted off his shoulders, “our offer still stands to welcome you back. Of course, I think we can all agree you’re a bit overqualified for a Padawan by now.”

She’s a little confused—she has to undergo formal trials to pass the Padawan phase, something Anakin had only begun to train her in before she left. How would she possibly catch up? What were they on about?

“Ahsoka, you have proven yourself beyond worthy of an apprentice and commander. You are a strong Jedi and fierce leader. We believe…” and Obi-Wan gives a pointed look to Mace, who begrudgingly nods, “you are ready to become a Jedi Knight.”

Ahsoka’s mouth drops in shock. Anakin’s face breaks into a grin beside her, and she feels the pride and joy swelling from him in their bond. The Council stands and bows to her as she tries to keep her emotions in check.

 _Jedi Knight. General._ Everything she dreamed of as a youngling. A few years ago this would have been the peak of her existence—and she’s truly overjoyed, she is, but the fact that she is back with her brothers and Anakin and Obi-Wan, back at the Temple and welcomed home, is even more satisfying than being awarded a new title.

Ahsoka smiles back at the Council. “I will gladly accept.”

“And Anakin,” Obi-Wan adds, his eyes twinkling. “We have some news for you as well. Mace?”

And in a glorious moment of perfectly timed poetic justice, he gives Mace Windu a pointed look as if to say, _don’t you want to give your favorite Knight the news?_

Mace grimaces and Ahsoka has to bite her tongue from bursting out laughing. It looks as if he’s just swallowed something very bitter and is attempting to keep him composure. After a moment of clearing his throat and stalling, he manages not to _spit_ it out.

“Skywalker, we believe you are ready for the rank of Master.”

It’s like fireworks have gone off—Ahsoka lets out a laugh and Anakin shouts in exhilaration, “It’s about kriffing _time!”_ And the Council are clapping, and for not the first time today Ahsoka feels so happy she can hardly breathe.

They both reach for each other in the same moment, hugging each other so hard he knocks the wind out of her, laughing elatedly and crying just a little bit and holding tight to each other.

She doesn’t see Obi-Wan get up from his chair and join them, but Anakin pulls him into their hug despite his protests and then it’s just the three of them, standing there together, having survived so much. And yet, they were still alive. Still together. And now they can build a new future together, Ahsoka thinks, even if it sounds a little cheesy.

She is perfectly content to stay in the middle of the council chambers, crushed in a hug with the only family she’s ever known. Home at last.


	4. Chapter 4

The first night in her new quarters, Ahsoka wakes in a cold sweat, stifling a scream.

Bone-chilling visions fill her nightmares, trapping her in a suffocating loop as she struggles to break out of it. They aren’t traumatic flashbacks, either, like she’s used to getting (Jedi need more therapy, she thinks) but ghastly scenes she is unfamiliar with. Clones, attacking and killing their Jedi. A planet vaporized into nothingness. A terrible, unfamiliar Sith Lord.

And worst of all…Anakin accepting Sidious’ deal and bowing to him—succumbing to the Dark side and becoming a Sith.

She tears herself out of the visions as his yellow eyes bore into hers.

Ahsoka sits on her bed—uncomfortable, because she never really had a bed when she was on the run or when she was at war in the Order, and she isn’t used to it—and tries to erase the things she has seen. They’re confusing, because she _knows_ Anakin didn’t turn and that Palpatine is dead. Surely they aren’t _future_ visions. No, they can’t be. Impossible. She forces herself to push the fear back down her throat.

When she was a Padawan, sharing her quarters with Anakin helped with her nightmares a lot. Many times, earlier into the war, her fear would project so strongly through their bond that he would wake up too. He would sit next to her and rub circles on her back while she calmed down, listen if she wanted to talk about it.

As soon as she got a little older, she was able to shield her panic better, and more than often succeeded in not waking him. But she still found comfort in his sleeping, calm form as she attempted to slow her breathing and remind herself that the nightmare was over.

Now, however, she has an empty, impersonal room all to herself. And she hates it.

Anakin’s quarters _are_ right across the hall, but she doesn’t want to wake him. After all he’s been through, the man needs to sleep for a week straight. Besides, she isn’t a child anymore. She’s a Knight, and Jedi Knights do not wake up their former masters because they had a bad dream.

She had frequent dreams in her time away from the Jedi, and really hoped that after all those months of sleepless nights she could have some respite back at the Temple. She spent so long being sleep-deprived and exhausted; could the galaxy not give her a moment’s rest?

Ahsoka rubs at the circles under her eyes, runs a hand down her face as she stares into the mirror mounted on the wall. It’s small, but for a Jedi would probably be considered a luxury. What other “worldly” items will she be allowed now that she’s a Knight?

She should be sleeping—she assesses her reflection, the bandages still in place from her stay in the medbay, skin still bruised and broken in places. Even her shadow looks tired, shoulders slumped in weariness, her body still feeling weak and battered. The soreness seeps through her muscles all the way to her bones, her neck stiff, head still a little light.

And yet, the sleep won’t come.

She gives up, finally, wrapping a blanket around herself and settling for walking the dimly lit corridors of the Temple. The soft silence is welcoming after the cacophony of battle, her montrals grateful for the rest. The only sound is her bare feet on the cold tile.

Ahsoka finds herself on one of the rooftop gardens, overlooking Coruscant. Even at this hour, speeders are still buzzing past, the skyscrapers still brightly lit. The city is alive even now, stretching out before her, tumbling outwards and up and extending down hundreds of levels into the underworld. It seems they’ll keep expanding until there is nowhere left to go.

She finds it funny that not long ago she was buried in the underbelly of the city, hurting and lonely and just trying to survive in a world that had seemingly cast her out forever. She smiles softly; if only she’d known what the future held, how she would be welcomed home again at last. What her life looked like now, she isn’t sure—she’s never been a real Jedi during peacetime. From the second she became a Padawan, war was the only thing she knew. Now that there aren’t any campaigns to wage or covert operations to execute, no battlefields full of Separatists to face…it’s a strange, silent peace that almost unsettles her.

“Couldn’t sleep either?”

Ahsoka starts at the voice, wondering how she failed to sense Anakin’s presence as he appears beside her. He still looks tired, though less rattled and worn, as he leans on the railing and studies the city, a content look in his eyes.

“I thought after the war was over I would sleep through the night,” Ahsoka admits. “But the visions are still there. And just as strong.”

Anakin sighs. “I guess they don’t just go away overnight. It’s gonna take a while to get used to life after the war.”

She chuckles wryly. “We’ll have to get used to the idea that things are gonna be okay, I suppose. But I don’t know how to do that.”

“I always hated that you didn’t get to do any part of your apprenticeship before the war started. You were just thrown right into it when you were still practically a youngling.”

Ahsoka rolls her eyes. “I was fourteen, I was _hardly_ a youngling!”

“You were still a child,” he says, his expression somber. “You shouldn’t have had to see those things.”

“I know,” she agrees, quietly. She still sees those things in her dreams. After a beat, and a deep breath, she says, “I was having nightmares about what would have happened if Sidious had succeeded in turning you.”

Anakin goes pale, gripping the railing. “The Son showed me it on Mortis. It…I couldn’t fathom such evil. I would have done such terrible things, Ahsoka. It sickens me.”

“But you didn’t,” she reminds him firmly. “I just…I don’t know why I keep seeing them in my visions. He’s dead.”

He shudders involuntarily, as if reliving the moment he slaughtered the Sith Lord. “I’m sorry you had to see that, even in your dream.”

She shrugs. “Not sure I’ll ever see a good night’s sleep in my lifetime. I’ve accepted that.”

The faintest of smiles appears on his face as the skyline’s lights reflect in his eyes. A moment passes before he says, “I’m really proud of you, Ahsoka.”

She flushes a bit under the praise. “It’s just Knighthood.”

He rolls his eyes. “It’s more than that. But even besides that…I’m proud of _you._ For who you’ve become. For liberating a whole planet by yourself, and being able to forgive people who certainly don’t deserve it. I was always worried I would mess you up by being your teacher, but maybe I did something right.”

She laughs at this, elbowing him. “I would’ve been dead in a battlefield a long time ago without you.” She pulls the blanket tighter around her shoulders as a gentle breeze blows across the garden.

“Do you want to go to Padme’s apartment?” He asks out of the blue. “I have a lot to tell you.”

“You mean your wife?” Ahsoka retorts, and bursts out laughing at the expression on his face. His jaw drops open.

“H—how— _Ahsoka!_ ” Anakin splutters.

“Did you _seriously_ think none of us had any clue?” She exclaims. “Even Rex knew something was going on! I did some… _research_ after I left to confirm.”

He slowly closes his mouth, still looking flabbergasted. “Are you…upset? I wanted to tell you, but I—”

She waves her hand at him. “Of course not. You didn’t want to burden me with information I didn’t need at the time. The less people, the less risk of the Council finding out. I’m happy for you, Skyguy. Seriously. Padme is amazing.”

He sighs in relief. “Thank you, Snips. You have no idea how much that means to me.”

“Now that I know about your secret life, we can totally go visit her. Even though it’s an ungodly hour,” she comments, remembering that it was well after midnight when she left her quarters.

Anakin smirks. “Well, you don’t know _everything._ ”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this timeline, Padme hasn’t given birth to the twins yet. They’re close, but in my opinion, she probably had them a bit early in Revenge of the Sith due to the, uh...stressful situation:)  
> Apologies for the short chapter and late update, college classes just started up again and it’s been crazy!  
> Also, totally open for future plot ideas/suggestions.

They pull up to Padme’s familiar apartment, and it is Ahsoka’s turn to be stunned speechless.

She bickers with Anakin as they approach, arguing that it’s _far too late_ in the evening to visit her, they can just bother her another time.

“It’s important, Snips,” he assures her, a soft smile on his lips that she sees pretty rarely; he’s hiding something. Something good, most likely.

“You’re being so dramatic, why won’t you—”

“Ani? Ahsoka!” The door swings open and Ahsoka’s mouth drops.

Padme is _pregnant_ —very much so—and she’s smiling warmly, and Ahsoka has missed her so much. She realizes it’s the first time she’s seen her in months, since before she left the Order. She’s missed the older woman’s wisdom and kindness, the way she can keep Anakin levelheaded.

Padme sweeps her into a hug before she can react, and Ahsoka remembers how Sidious almost tricked Anakin into falling to the Dark Side just to save her. It makes her sick, the way he manipulated Anakin’s loved ones and his fear of losing people. Ahsoka had been _so close_ to losing him that it takes her breath away. It’s all she can do not to burst into tears as she hugs Padme back, thanking the Force yet again for the miracle it somehow managed to orchestrate.

“H—how long? When is it due?” Ahsoka splutters. She’s never understood much about children or babies, and is even less familiar with human biology. But even she knew Padme had to be due _soon_.

“ _They_ are due very soon,” Anakin grins, sweeping his wife into an embrace. “A boy and a girl. Twins.”

Joy swells in the Force; life after the war just kept getting better and better. Ahsoka laughs. “Twins! Skyguy, I can’t believe it. I’m so happy for you both.”

Padme smiles again, radiantly, and Ahsoka is still trying to process the fact that there will be _two_ little Skywalkers running around pretty soon. She hopes they get Padme’s brains and less of Anakin’s recklessness.

“We’re sorry we couldn’t tell you sooner, Ahsoka,” Padme says, more serious this time. “Even before the babies. About…us being married. We didn’t want to burden you with what you knew was against the Jedi Code. And then when you were away, we couldn’t contact you, and…”

Anakin looks a little pained at the memory; she tries to brush away his wife’s apology. “I had my suspicions, don’t worry. And this is a lovely surprise. I hold none of it against you.”

“Well that’s good,” Anakin grins, “and I hope you like the sound of Aunt Ahsoka.”

A new, warm sense of pride swells in her chest, and she winks at him. “Someone has to keep them from getting into less trouble than their father.”

“Hey now!” He protests, and his wife rolls her eyes at him.

The three of them laugh and trade stories into the early hours of the morning, until Ahsoka is falling asleep on Anakin's shoulder, and she is once again struck by how impossibly happy she is now that things are right again—a feeling she never thought would return when she left the Order.

——————

“You’re worried,” Ahsoka comments the next morning as they fly back to the Temple after a short but eventful breakfast at Padme’s apartment. Anakin had jokingly criticized Ahsoka’s cooking skills (Padme let her help with part of breakfast) and Ahsoka hit him with one of the pancakes she was making. Padme, ever the negotiator, managed to narrowly avoid a full-fledged food fight between the two of them.

Anakin sighs as he pilots, his eyes on the traffic lanes ahead. “A bit. Not about Padme. I know now that Sidious was lying to me. She’ll be fine in childbirth. But after…”

“Are you worried about being a father?” She says gently, the realization finally dawning on her. He worries about _her_ enough as is; he probably has a million more reservations about raising his own kids. She knows without a doubt he is capable, but he frets too much about his loved ones and things out of his control.

A long silence passes. “I think I am. Padme is incredible. I can’t think of a better mother. But…I don’t know. What if I mess them up? What if I’m not a good father? I never had one. I’m not sure I know how to _be_ one.”

Ahsoka snorts. “I never had one either, Skyguy. Never knew him, at least. Master Plo looked out for me, for a while. And then…Anakin, you practically _raised_ me. You taught me everything I know, both about being a Jedi and how to survive and how to care about people. I’d be dead in a battlefield somewhere without you.”

“Don’t talk like that, Snips,” he scolds, but the frown on his features softens a bit. “You’re capable of those things without me.”

“I’m serious!” She exclaims, and he looks over at her at last. “Anakin. You’re the closest thing to a father I’ve ever had.”

He smiles then, a real one, and she’s really liking the frequency of them now that the weight of the galaxy has been lifted from his shoulders. He squeezes her shoulder as they pull up to the Temple, the sunrise shining brilliantly over Coruscant, and she wonders what their life will look like with peacekeeping missions instead of fighting a war.

Her comm beeps as she hops out of the speeder. “Master Skywalker and Knight Tano, your presence is requested by the Council. We have a new assignment for you.”

“Well, that certainly didn’t take long,” Anakin groans. “Let’s hope it’s less than a few weeks. Padme could have the babies any time now.”

“Have you…” Ahsoka trails off, unsure how to phrase it. _Have you told the Council you’ve violated one of the most crucial Jedi Codes?_ “Do they know?”

“Sort of,” he says unhelpfully. “They figured it out when they put all the pieces together about Palpatine. They didn’t want to outright discuss it in the debrief, but it was hinted that they would overlook it. Since, you know, I saved the Jedi and all. I gave them some strongly worded advice that they should reconsider that aspect of the Code.”

She nods in understanding, mind wandering again over their upcoming mission. It will be incredible to be back in the field, fighting with Anakin like she had for so long; she’s missed it, honestly. She fights back the nervous flutter in her stomach—her first mission as a Knight, kriff—and the pressure she feels already. What if she keeps losing men like during the war? What if she can’t lead as a general? It’s far more responsibility than she’s ever had.

“Ahsoka,” Anakin interrupts, sensing her thoughts. She flushes a little, realizing she hasn’t been shielding very well. After the incident on Mandalore, her shields were still repairing, her mind recovering. Her body is still a little sore, too. But they’ve always been able to read each other well. He might’ve known what she was thinking even without their training bond. “It’ll be alright. You’re more than qualified for this.”

“I know. I just…” she trails off.

“I’ll be with you on the mission. We’ll do it together, okay? This is new for both of us. Besides,” he adds as they stride through the Temple doors, “I want to hear Master Windu address me as _Master Skywalker_ at least one more time.”


End file.
